I'm here, digging myself out from the shadows. I've been able to piece PSP back together, and was able to get the key filters I use for designing put back into place along with all my other necessary "evils" that make designing easy, productive, and fun. :-) What's been going on with me? Well... quite a bit, as if I need more excitement and adventure in my life. First off, Hubby is fine from the accident. I have received a few messages about how he's doing, and he's perfectly fine. He had a slightly stiff shoulder the day after the accident, but nothing since that time. He's more upset over having the truck be totaled out than anything else. We still haven't decided if we are going to take the truck for salvage and pay out of pocket for any expenses, or to just give it over to the insurance company for good. Living on almost 20 acres requires having some type of farming vehicle, and I don't really think my wee Neon is gonna cut going across the pasture and mounds of dirt that the feral hogs dig up when they invade our property looking for tasty morsels. We're going to have to get another vehicle too, regardless if we keep the truck or not. We don't have the best credit, so not many people are willing to even look at us for financing at this point, even for a used vehicle. For me? Well.... that's an entirely different novel saga... *bittersweet smile* I've been in the shadows all week long after getting a phone call from the doctor's office Monday afternoon. I had gone to the doctor last week to discuss treatment options for my pcos (polycystic ovarian syndrome) since I was told I have a double uterus, and any iud method we were hoping to have went out the window because my girlie parts aren't made for it. I also haven't had my "friend" visit since January, which is pretty common to go months without anything and then bleed like no tomorrow for weeks on end when it does finally happen. I'm a ball of hormones that are totally out of control, mister! Well.. part of my treatment has been to put me on this medication that's used for treating type 2 diabetes: metformin. What this horsepill does is to counteract all the estrogen my body is throwing off, so much of the stuff it's making me develop testosterone and making me look rather manly (ick, man hands!) with facial hair and hair in places that shouldn't exist. o.O No one bothered to tell me once the metformin started doing its thing that I would become a super-uber-ultra-mega-brood-mare birthing machine and that it would be best to not do anything of an adult nature with Hubby until I got on some form of birth control method. To make a long story short: For the last few years, Hubby and I have desperately tried to have another baby. We finally gave up the ghost and accepted the fact it wasn't in the stars for us when we had the doctor's appointment last week. Well, surprise surprise Gomer Pile, we're expecting baby numero two. I have very mixed emotions at this point. I had just accepted the fact I wasn't going to have another baby, and was fine with just being the happy lil trio that we are. This news has completely blindsided me like no tomorrow. I'm so angry with the doctor's office about not telling me what we needed to do to help prevent this from happening. I didn't even know what pcos was until last weeks' appointment. I've been given this diagnosis a year ago, yet no one ever sat down to explain exactly what was going on, why I have such a hairy chin and sideburns, why I'm so overwheight, and why it's been so hard to have a baby. Not one blasted person. Now, I am preggy again, and I am just absolutely terrified. I was told at last week's appointment that if I did get preggy again, it would have just as much complication to it as with William, if not more so based upon my girlie parts' setup. I'm off my meds completely (bipolar meds), and am only taking the synthroid as well as the metformin minimally. I'm a complete wreck, and have been crying for hours a day just about since we "got the call" Monday. I am afraid I'll regret this baby, and that it will show through my emotions not only with the pregnancy, but afterward as well. I had the hardest time with attachment to William, and then there's the postpartum psychosis that I was hospitalized for nearly a month about with the homicidal thoughts I had of not only hurting William, but myself as well, or wanting to give him away to complete strangers who looked at me funny. I know I'm even in a manic state right now just sitting here typing this entry. I can tell it by how my fingers are slapping the keyboard, and how my train of thought is flowing. I just barely got William out of pullups the last month or two, and now I am looking at having to buy diapers all over again by the end of the year? I even know the EXACT DATE this happened: March 9th. That's sad, really sad. I have thoughts and feelings I so badly need to express, but if I did that, I'd have people jumping down my throat left and right and being all self rightous about, and I definitely can't take that right now. Anyway, this is where I've been. I'm designing for a charity collab kit for a fellow designer I work with over at CCK, and hopefully my contribution will be a welcome breath of fresh air for not only this wonderful cause, but for my psyche as well. I think I'm going to log here for a while and have some momma time with William, building a train track for Thomas and his friends. I have a few more papers I want to make for this collab kit, and then will get it all pieced together to get it sent off. Thanks for reading about things for me right now. If someone does wish to comment, please be so kind as to not preach to me. I'm not going to do what my feelings desire, because this is yet another blessing for us. It was 3 years to the day nearly that my Daddy passed away that our newest angel came into being. How can I give up on that? I can't. Anyway.. please be kind, that's all I ask.

I'd have no luck at all.... As if I need a wee bit more excitement added to my life. I have my big computer back, but am still trying to recover via dialup on the laptop. That's what I'm on right now actually as I sit here and type in a very hard kitchen chair. *rubs tush* Yesterday, it was decided that Hubby would be the lucky dawg and be involved in a major car accident while he was being my angel (had my follow appt with the surgeon doc yesterday - another wonderful tale) by getting meds this doctor was adding to my collection of pill bottles I already pray over each time it's med time for me. Some youngling of the age of 17 tried to cut across Hubby's lane of traffic from the opposite direction and into a construction zone (gotta loved Texas roads, they're always being "improved" in some fashion in a major construction project) to a turnoff to avoid traffic. Well, he avoided traffic alright, by plowing right into Hubby. Hubby is fine except for some bruising and soreness in his left shoulder. I can't say as much for his baby, his Dodge pickup. The youngling was also in a Dodge pickup, a brand new 2009 baby that must have just come off the lot at our local Dodge dealer not but a few miles from town. Hubby's truck sustained heavy front end damage, prolly totalling out the thing. The youngling's entire passenger side of the pickup was completely caved in. His passenger is so lucky to have walked away, and interestingly enough, the airbags in both trucks never deployed. It was by sheer luck that Hubby changed his mind from taking my car to his truck instead. If he would have gone in the Neon, he'd be in critical condition because it would have gone completely under the truck instead of plowing into it. Sooooooo..... I am getting the feeling that we're being given a message here. I haven't exactly figured out what this message is, but it's definitely there in all that has transpired these last 6 weeks or so. I still don't have PSP, other things, but not a suitable, working program I can do anything with, so no designing still. (And, I could desperately use the outlet at this point in time!!!!) However, I continue to have a sale going on at Cotton Candy Kreations for the rest of the month to help bring in some money to cover computer repairs along with the recent expenses of Hubby's accident. Also this weekend, almost the entire store is having a 50% off sale all weekend long! Be sure to drop by and check out some fantastic specials!!! This isn't for PU items only either! CU items, actions, scripts, almost everything is half off!!! Get spring started off on the right foot for all your digiscrapping needs with this sale that can't be passed up!

Not much to say, except my hard drive crashed and burned. Sunday evening, the blue screen of death came knocking on my door, and took my computer away, and everything on it. I lost all my scraps, all my designs, tools, programs, plugins, filters, fonts, anything and everything just gone in the blink of an eye. I dunno what I'm going to do at this point. That is all, carry on.

Hi y'all... I'm celebrating joining CCK by having a 50% off sale for at least the next week!! If you've seen my newest kits, and have wanted to find a way to get them but with little cost, now's the time to take advantage of this sale! Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING is up for grabs, no holds barred!! I've got alphas, kits, and even CU items! Come check it out and celebrate this new venture with me! ~~*~ Whispy's D'zines 50% Off Sale at CCK ~*~~

Hi y'all... Please excuse my melancholy mood. I'm rather somber, and don't have much bubble in me. Yesterday was the 3 yr anniversary of my Daddy's passing from a horrible staph infection in his blood that completely tore him apart inside. Antique Romance has been a true labor of love for me for the past week as a means of being able to put my chaotic emotions I have rolling around inside into something positive and meaningful instead of how they generally turn out into. They shared a love so deep for 34 years, and I hope I was able to portray that in what you see below.

Not everything is shown in the previews, with papers totaling 8 (800 X 800) and elements totaling 64. Everything has been created and saved at 300 dpi for optimum print quality. Elements range from antiqued buttons to roses (my Mom's favorite flower), from cameo broaches to aged parchment papers to diamond heart overlays to make your creations sparkle and shine.

If you would like to pick this pretty up, you can find it at my store:

Antique Romance - A CCK Exclusive

Thanks for looking as well as reading my ramble.

Hi y'all...

Check out my CCK store!!

I should have kept my yapper shut. Our fridge freezer is at a cold 45 degrees blowing nice, warm air... no idea how the refrigerator part is doing. Sears said they wouldn't come out until next Tuesday at the earliest. Am having to pay someone mileage to come to our road out in the middle of nowhere (as in like the movie Deliverance!) to do an emergency call tomorrow. I'm in tears, and can't get ahold of Mom to see if this is considered an "emergency" for her credit card since she's off in jolly old England with her beau until Friday. Now I know why the sky is crying, because I just can't take another hit like this. That's all I'm gonna say. :-(

Hi y'all... Well, we've been praying for rain, and guess what?!? It's going to be a frog-drownin' kinda rain in the coming days. Our area is supposed to get 5 inches, possibly over 6 by the time Saturday morning comes around. WOW!! So, I've been put to task by Hubby to get my kitchen back in order now that my fancy-schmancy dishwasher is installed and working well beyond I could ever expect, on top of that dreaded leak under the sink is fixed that required my mop bucket be under there because it would pour water out from the old disposer (which the new one is like a million and one times better, faster, and oh-so-quieter!) as well as the pipe that connected the two sinks to go out into the wall and out of the house. I've gotten some things done, and am waiting for my bleach to dry up under the sink before I start putting things back home under it (for good I hope!). I've been kinda stressing and swinging pretty bad, so I've let my mousie do some clicking and have played around with creating overlays while watching the sky cry and birds go crazy with bug bombing.

They're kinda dark, and when I was messing with them, they went better with darker colors than lighter. But, there's ALWAYS room for adjustments with those wee bars over on the side of our programs. *hehehe*

These are totally CU oriented, and no credit is required! I do ask that if you download, to please leave a TY or leaving a clicky-loo on an adsense box over thar to the right if you're in too big of a hurry. Any and all support is greatly appreciated. They are for taggers, sized 800X 800 just as an fyi. Download is below, and will be available for your snagging pleasure for one week only! So if you like, make sure you don't snooze! ;-)

TTFN!

~~*~ Download here ~*~~

Woot, I'm so excited, I can't contain myself! *lol* Floral Fantasy is here!! Come check out this beautiful kit that is now up for your buying pleasure at Cotton Candy Kreations!

Hi y'all... So much to say and do, not enough time in the week to get it all done! Second verse, same as the first! *hehehe* First off, I'm still getting set up and settled at CCK. I've been working hard the last few days on a new kit that will only be available there, and I'm all uber excited about it! It's called Floral Fantasy, and is all about spring! I have FOUR fantastic alphas with it, as well as the entire alpha collection that will be going into the store for it as well. I'm hoping I can get that done in the next day or so (once I get stuffs figured out that is! *hehehe*), and will be sharing that with yas then! I have a freebie that I'll be sharing too, so don't think you'll be left out! ;-) As far as my bloggie goes... I'm going to be taking down my freebies, and when I post new ones, will be having them up for only a limited time. I know people come across my blog not always when something is shared, but to help keep things new, updated, and fresh, I think this is going to be best for now. I know a lot of designers have their blogs set up that freebies are good for only a week, sometimes even less than that. I'm going to start deactiving all kit links beginning today. So, if you haven't snagged something you really can't live without, now's the time to get it. Once it's taken down, it won't be available again. Another reason for this is something that is a rather big sticking point for me. I've noticed a dramatic decline in comments over the last couple of weeks. People are downloading like crazy, yet hardly anyone says a quickie thank you. I've set up several options for you to just say even TYVM, or even TY without having to log into 4shared with it's many problems. A quicky "Hi!" in my shout box, a click on one of my google ads, anything really. I don't ask for luvins for Mojo to stroke my ego. I ask for them because that's just the kind thing to do to show your appreciation when someone gives from their heart. At least that's how I was raised, and I would think that even during today's rough times, people would be even more generous with those two magickal words than ever before. I think William uses his "nice words" more than what I've had experienced, and that really makes my heart sad. Anyway.. not trying to lecture here, just need to get that off my chest. As you'll soon see, there will be many changes coming to my blog very soon! Some fantastic, and some I'm sure I'll get uglies left about. Please remember I'm doing this for me, m'kay? I know I won't please anyone, and that in the end I need to do what's best for me. Hopefully those that care about me will stick it out and in the end we'll all enjoy it to the very best. Ok, I have a puney William to care for, and have more previews/designing to get going on while Mojo is awake. Have a great day everyone! Hope to see ya again real soon!

Wow, so much has happened in the last week, I think my head is still spinning!! Between my designing, and R/L drama, I dunno which way to go! I think Hubby and I bought The Money Pit. :-( If it isn't the well pump blowing up in smoke (literally), it's the continued issues we have in William's bathroom of leaks left and right. Just a couple of nights ago, William discovered water steadily dripping from the intake valve (he is now prohibited from watching the DIY Network as well as reading Daddy's "1 Million and 1 ways to fix your house" book from the Home Depot) and was trying to fix it. We thought he messed up the potty, but it appears the link is coming from inside the wall. Have I mentioned that a couple of months ago, Hubby was gracious enough to try to put up drywall to start piecing his bathroom back together into a functioning room? So now, we not only have his shower leaking (we discovered that tidbit last week), but now the potty leaking too. Not just house drama.. car drama too... Last week (think it was Friday?), Hubby was on his way home. He's been using my car since it's better on gas milage, and he seems to have better success with his tours because of it being more professional than having to tote his tours around in his redneck pickup. Well, while driving home and only a couple of miles away, the last of the General tires I had on my car decided to go *pop* (this was the driver rear tire) and strip itself of half the tread. The tire is still totally aired up, just missing tread. It knocked the back bumper off to the point it's barely hanging on, as well as totally scrape up and damage the rear 1/4 panel and back passenger door. I met with the insurance adjuster yesterday, and he came out with his nifty camera to take pictures and get info about the damage. Thankfully, our policy is going to cover it, and file it using the lowest deductible we have instead of filing under collision. He called me this morning, and told me we're looking at roughly $1000 in repairs, if the repair place doesn't find any more damage with the bumper popping off on the driver side. Thankfully, we're looking at only a 1/4 of that coming out of our pocket, but we will have to get a new tire before doing anything else and taking it into town. Da Hubster... It appears he needs new eyes. I thought that the headache he's been dealing with was just a side effect of the anti-biotics he's had to take for the sinus infection. No, sad to say, he needs new eyeballs... errr... glasses. Hubby and William have no health insurance, so I'm flipping around at how we're going to get this taken care of between now and Monday-Tuesday when Hubby's off work. Rainsoft anyone....?? This is the company that has our water filtration system set up. We've had this system for less than a year. For the last week, I've been waiting on pins and needles to have someone come out and figure out why the tank isn't pulling in water, why we now have stinky water that smells like something lost its life in, and why the filtered tap at the sink no longer works. This is now time number THREE someone has had to be called out here since December. GRRRRRR!!!!!! I left a rather ugly message on their answering machine yesterday, and am not surprised that someone called not too long ago, promising that some guy will be here "this evening". Won't hold my breath, and if no one shows up, then heads are gonna roll tomorrow!! Oh, my exciting news?? *lol* I did start off with that as the subject, huh? Sorry for the vent, just no one has been told of my frustrations of the day (I've fielded over 20 calls about our problems/issues and some I haven't even written about because I don't wanna have y'all bored to tears by this poing) and I don't think Hubby would like to be blasted with this once he walks in the door in a couple of hours. AWESOMENESS NEWS: I've just become the newest designer for Cotton Candy Kreations!!! I haven't been set up yet, since it just went through as of oh-dark-hundred this morning. But, I just had to share such wonderful news after such a cruddy week I've had. At this point, I think I'm going to just go with one store until I can get my feet steady, and then just go from there. I am also still going to create freebies for yas, so don't fret!! But, I do hope you'll come along and see what I have to share over at CCK! And besides, they have such wonderful yummy-ness there that's too irresistable to not get! ;-)